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My wife puts me in situations where I can’t win



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I recently helped my parents pick up a trampoline for my nieces and nephews. It was a two-hour trip, and my mom planned to make burritos for everyone. I mentioned it to my wife a few days in advance, and although she was annoyed that it was happening in the middle of the day, she agreed since we didn’t have any other plans.

However, as the time to leave approached, my wife started getting upset. She complained that she would be hungry because I was leaving right at lunchtime. I suggested different food options at home, but she rejected them all. I reminded her that she could come with me and have a burrito too, but she said it would be awkward because she couldn’t help move the trampoline due to a twisted ankle.


I asked her to let me know what she wanted to eat, and I would either get it or buy the ingredients from the store. However, she still couldn’t decide and told me to figure it out. Eventually, she said she wanted a burrito. I suggested she have a snack and I would bring back a burrito for her later. She found this unacceptable because she didn’t want to wait two hours to eat.

With time running short, I foolishly told her she was being unreasonable and that as an adult, she could handle her own lunch situation if none of the options I suggested worked. Then she started crying. I gave in and said I would go buy ingredients and make a burrito for her. I went to the store grumpily to buy the ingredients. However, as soon as I left, she started texting me, saying there was no need for me to do that and questioning why I was making her feel bad.

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I returned and cooked a chicken burrito for her, but she didn’t want it because she felt bad about being called unreasonable. I practically begged her to eat it and placed it on the table next to her. An hour later, she started texting me again, saying she had a headache from hunger, implying it was my fault. She claimed I put everyone else’s needs ahead of hers and that I played the role of a knight in shining armor for the world but not for my partner.

Keep in mind that these two hours were the only time we spent apart the whole weekend. When I arrived home with some leftover burrito, it was 20 minutes later than originally expected, and she was upset with me. She ignored me for the rest of the afternoon, except for mentioning that I should have thought of going to a place like Moe’s and buying her a burrito instead of making one, as if I was stupid for not thinking of that. The next morning, everything seemed fine between us.

I can’t help but feel like this behavior is unusual for an adult, and it happens repeatedly in different situations, not just when she’s hungry. Am I overreacting? It just seems off to me, and it’s starting to affect our relationship.

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