My partner and I, both 26 years old, have been in a committed relationship for nearly seven years. However, there’s one significant aspect missing from our journey: I have yet to meet his parents.
His parents are deeply religious, and upon learning that I am not Christian, they immediately expressed their disapproval. Additionally, their discovery that we had engaged in a sxxual relationship around two years into our relationship created further complications.
His mother reacted with extreme distress upon finding out, often entering his room to persuade him to end our relationship while I secretly listened over the phone. Since that revelation, he has been caught in a struggle to balance his mother’s expectations and my own needs, as his parents made it clear they wanted him to break up with me. Consequently, I have not had the opportunity to meet them, and they have shown no interest in meeting me.
This situation has significantly impacted our s*x life, as we haven’t been intimate for the past three years. The emotional turmoil caused by his mother’s reaction led him to abstain from s*x, and he has not initiated it since. He naturally possesses a low s*x drive, and I am willing to forgo that aspect of our relationship to ensure his comfort and prevent any further strain on his relationship with his mother. He fears his mother will discover our intimacy again and become distraught.
While we maintain emotional closeness and affection, we have refrained from progressing beyond certain boundaries. Our physical intimacy has been limited to acts of affection without s*xual involvement.
Several years have passed, and although I have periodically raised the topic of meeting his mother, he has consistently avoided addressing it. However, last year, I reached a breaking point and presented him with an ultimatum. I made it clear that if he was not serious about introducing me to his parents and actively working on our sxx life, I would need to consider taking a break from the relationship.
Since then, he has made some efforts to address these issues. I understand that it has taken him considerable time because he struggles with conflicts and fears the consequences from his parents. Despite nearly seven years together, his parents still do not inquire about me, though they have reluctantly accepted that he is with me, albeit without approving of his decision.
Honestly, I find myself growing distant within the relationship and contemplating the possibilities beyond it. While I still love him deeply and envision a future together, my patience has worn thin, and I question the sustainability of our current situation. Witnessing a friend go through a breakup has reinforced my belief that it should not have taken this long for him to take these steps for the sake of our relationship.