Relationships
We Only Did Few Rounds In Our Honeymoon, Since Then My Husband Have Been Keeping It From Me- Woman Narrates
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Our marriage is only nine months old. We dated for four years before we finally got married. Within the four years that we dated, he was all about shuperu and more. He wanted it and I had no reason to keep it from him so I gave it to him whenever he wanted it. I won’t say it’s the shuperu that kept us glued together but its contribution can’t overemphasize. We could fight for days and it would the only thing that would bring us together. It was always different after a fight. The way he gives his all and the way I put my all into it makes it look like it was the only thing we needed in our lives. We had a very good time while dating so my thinking was that it was going to get better when we get married.
On our honeymoon, it was a disaster. I was too tired to care and he was too tired to want it. But we tried anyway. We were able to get some lousy rounds just to keep us going. We returned from our honeymoon on Thursday. Everything was new. We couldn’t live in the house each of us was living in because they were too small to contain us. We had a new room that came with a new fragrance. We had new bedsheets that spiced our sleep. We slept with the music on just to musk up the noise that both of us produced during the action. Everything was stacked in our favor and everything around us screamed, “Get to it already, we can’t wait to see some action.”
But my husband will lay flat on the bed and begin to snore away. Nothing I do gets his attention. I’m a woman with loud hormones. They never keep quiet so I want it often, especially now that we are married and have no reason to be careful. I will tap him; “Bernard, get up. The way you’ve been treating me these days, I don’t see top at all. What happened to you? Have you been stung by a bee? It doesn’t even get up when I play with it? What’s happening to you?” He’ll talk through his sleep and say a lot of things that don’t make sense. The bottom line of his explanation had always been, ”I’m tired. Let’s sleep for a while. Wake me up at dawn.”
I will wake him up at dawn and he’ll postpone the match to early morning. Immediately after his alarm goes off, he will rush to the bathroom as if someone is after him. So I told myself, ”Maybe, he’s had enough so let me stop worrying him. When he wants it, he’ll chase for it.” Brothers and sisters, we went for four weeks and this man did nothing to show that he was in the mood. Me that I said I won’t mind him would be all over him, rubbing my skin to his skin, struggling to get his attention but he won’t mind me. He’ll sleep through all the rubs while I lay there hungry and angry.
I have this friend I talk to about everything. She got married four years before I did so she has more experience in marriage than I do. Mavis. I called her one night and told her everything about it. “Mavis, can you imagine what opana is doing to me? I don’t know what has come over him. He doesn’t touch it. I do my best to get his attention. I’ve tried all the tricks under my belt but this man pretends he hasn’t seen me. What could be the issue? Has your opana ever done that to you?” She laughed at me. She said, “But you just got married? This is the time to hit and fly in it.”
We had a lengthy conversation. In the end, she told me what to do.
She said, “Maybe he has gotten used to you. So much so that the lust level is low. Keep yourself away from him. Cover whatever is uncovered. If you sleep naked, it’s about time you found up-and-down pajamas and wear them at night. If you walk around the house showing everything you have, it’s time to stop it. Cover up. Men love to uncover things for themselves. They want to chase things. They would like to hunt. Give him the opportunity to look for what is hidden and he’ll always come chasing.”
Actually, I’ve heard that before but it didn’t sound to me like good advice. I like to be taken whenever and however. I don’t like the stage where we have to struggle through taking things off. I come ready but I decided to put her suggestions to use.
A week later, my husband saw the change in me and started asking questions; “You sleep in pajamas now? What movies have you been watching?” Another time he said, “Now, you’re doing very well. Your guardian angel would be proud of you. At least, he can now watch over you fully without turning his eyes away from your naked body.” Everything was a joke to him without seeing through the effort I’m putting up to get his attention. We went for two weeks without any action. Three weeks, no action. Instead of developing ways to get at me, he rather developed a new way of snoring that got on my nerves each night when I heard him snore. We were hitting a month when I rushed on him and took care of things.
That night we talked. I asked questions—questions that bothered my heart. “Dear, what’s happening? You don’t touch me anymore. We are married. We have a natural mandate to procreate and this is the only way we can. So why are you not chasing it like you used to?” He said, “Nothing is wrong. I’m just tired these days but it doesn’t matter. When you want it and you push toward me, we do it, or? Yeah, not all the time but you know we can’t do it all the time.” So that day we reached an agreement that we’ll make a conscious effort to do it at least twice a week. Three weeks later, we had nothing to show for our new resolution.
I went to another friend of mine who had also been married for years. She is also a childhood friend who tells me everything concerning her marriage and even uses her instances to advise me. After telling her everything, she also went on and on telling me the same thing that my friend told me; “Cover up. Keep it away from him. When he craves for it and comes closer to get it, pretend you’re not in the mood. Let him fight for it. Let him work for it. Men desire what they work for. They love to chase after what they can’t get. If you succeed in making him chase you, he’ll come at you all the time.” I said, “It doesn’t work. I’ve tried it before and it fell flat on my face. Or my husband isn’t a man?”
I decided to starve my urge just to rope him in. One week, two weeks, four weeks, six weeks, eight weeks later, nothing. Not even his leg falling on me accidentally. I will stay awake at night and think about all the things that could go wrong for him to behave this way. I will ask myself questions and the answer would come immediately. There was no question yet my bedroom was dead. We don’t have a child yet so I won’t blame it on issues after childbirth. I haven’t added on any weight. I dress well and always smell my best. I did less to get his attention when we were dating but now I go to the moon and back just to impress him.
I’ve even resorted to fighting him. You know, I told you the ones we did after a fight was always the best one, now my husband won’t even fight. I get angry at him and he’ll be laughing at me. All he has to do is get angry too so the two of us can set up a make-up match. But he won’t. I get angry and he makes a joke of my anger. This man is killing me slowly.
What could be the problem? And what could be the answer to this conundrum I find myself in with my husband? ‘Cover it’ doesn’t work. ‘Open it up’ doesn’t work so what else would work? Please tell me something na wei diɛ mintiasiɛ ooo. How can a nine-month-old marriage be this dry? Anna ɛyɛ duabɔ?
daniel musonda
May 9, 2022 at 7:00 am
Do a sugar test, maybe his diabetic…..let get checked at the men’s clinic.
Adeboye
May 9, 2022 at 7:13 am
You need to know wether he has side chik that doesn’t allow him to have your time
Olatunde handse
August 31, 2023 at 5:38 pm
He needs to get matured and deal with his lack of urge issues. Get someone, an elderly porson to talk in to his head.
Robert
December 4, 2023 at 2:26 am
This man is persuing a regret of marrying you agenda. Cast your mind back whilst you were dating everything was fine but now,it is different. He does’nt need you for anything.
He wants you out of His way completely so he can then pick the one he really live and wants to stay with. Don’t waste your time with such man is my advise.
Adeola
September 2, 2023 at 6:49 am
My advice to you is to try God power e.g fasting and prayer, move more closerto God. Awhat God can not do doesn’t exist
jafaru
May 9, 2022 at 7:24 am
Report to his family
Nelson
August 31, 2023 at 6:26 pm
This guy is in a calt believe me.He might be receiving a direction from an evil preist.r
Netete
August 31, 2023 at 5:41 pm
He might have someone who is sucking the energy out of him, your fellow gender are not smiling
Nelson
August 31, 2023 at 6:27 pm
This guy is in a calt believe me.He might be receiving a direction from an evil preist.r
Lazarus
August 31, 2023 at 6:45 pm
He may likely be having eretile dysfunction with low libido, he should see a doctor and all shall be alright
Ese hope
September 1, 2023 at 8:25 am
Al you need to do is to take it to God in highest Paryer there is nothing he can not do he will grante you request in Jesus name amen
P@
PG
August 31, 2023 at 7:50 pm
Make him angry by pretending to have someone f…king you & he will surely be jealous and return to you
Updul
November 6, 2023 at 4:43 pm
That’s exactly what I also wanted to say
Oto-obong john
August 31, 2023 at 8:10 pm
Draw his attention to get jeolous of u, by dressing hot after calling ur sister or your family member then pretend as if is a man then check out and tell him u want to buy something. Just let him suspect u while Heavenly God know that u are innocent so that u will be justisfy at last. Just let him suspect u by living very happy as if u have meet someone that is giving u happiness. Then start wearing jean touser and brazier so that he will no that u dont need his attention then he will surely come back to his senses.
Oto-obong john
August 31, 2023 at 8:13 pm
Why?
Johnson
August 31, 2023 at 8:41 pm
Let him go for deliverance and pray against spiritual wife attack
vincent
September 1, 2023 at 1:54 am
D
vincent
September 1, 2023 at 1:58 am
Do u pray at all. why not present ur challenges to God. Do this & it will be well with ur marraige
SaintRemy
September 1, 2023 at 2:04 am
Feed him with any manpower tablet without his consent before bed and see if he comes for you with speed or not.
Oldflow
September 1, 2023 at 5:37 am
Add some Spanish Flees to his water, to boost his libido, to arouse him . Once you add the Spanish Flees to his drinking water, he will drink it, and automatically get sexually aroused.
Amos
September 1, 2023 at 5:42 am
Someone has done juju on him go to church and let him be prayed for and get delivered
Namugabi Sharon
September 1, 2023 at 5:51 am
He is a gay just get another side dude for yourself whick kind of foolery is that shiaaaaaa he was pretending to be into you all along when in actual sense he is a gay get side dude. Am telling you as woman he will wake up from his slumber land.
Godfrey
September 1, 2023 at 5:53 am
The evil spirit is is eating our marriage slowly many family are suffering they’re going through many tribulations just to sustain their marriage,in short we need prayers heal our marriage n family.thank you
Agnes
September 1, 2023 at 6:11 am
This is abnormal, try asking God.i I mean pray God has the answer
EMMANUEL ONOJA
September 1, 2023 at 6:51 am
Either or both of you might be in need of deliverance from spirit spouse. Yes, some singles have dreams of intimacy and even having and caring for children in their dreams. When such people eventually get married, the spirit spouse will fight the physical spouse and make the physical marriage experience a bitter one. So du you or your hubby have such dreams? Pls seek for deliverance. I recommend you visit a prayer mountain like Christ Mercyland deliverance ministry at warri, Liberation ministry at Lagos,. e.t.c.
James
September 1, 2023 at 6:59 am
Please leave he will come back alone
Dennis iyede
September 1, 2023 at 8:40 am
Have you invite the institutional into the matter
Maureen Iwueke
September 1, 2023 at 8:41 am
Girl, if truly you have done all these still there is no interest nor his cucumber raising then there’s someone else taking his attention
Deb
September 1, 2023 at 8:56 am
Unfortunately, this happens with some men. What your experieced friends told you is true. What they didn’t tell is that, for some men, once they believe that you want it, they lose interest. Even the fights tell him that you still want it, and they , subconsciously,don’t like this. You will have to discipline your self to pretend you’ve lost interest permanently in it or in him, and each time you give in, that it was just to please him. This can be tough, particularly if you have high libido yourself, but its the only way from general experience. You may have to find a way to reduce your libido,or a secret way to take care of your high libido and make sure you don’t get caught, or things may get worse . Or decide whether all the subterfuge is worth it or you leave him and take care of your sanity.
Tunde Fagbemi
September 1, 2023 at 9:49 am
U guys need to go to where u started. Sit down and open up to urselves. Something is definitely wrong. It could a temporary Erectile Dyfusion(ED) which Doctors can handle since u guys are still young. Pray to God for solution.
Terseer Anya
September 1, 2023 at 11:26 am
Maybe he have a health challenge he just discovered.He still love you just take it easy with him. Try to talk to anyone you think he confirm in.
Onyebuchi Adaora
September 1, 2023 at 12:34 pm
You finished your honeymoon before you got married.But on a more serious note,the guy has something he is hiding.Maybe he has erectile dysfunction.Have a heart to heart talk with him so as to sewk solution before it is too late.
Julius Dela
September 1, 2023 at 3:44 pm
Fast and pray for divine intervention
It’s an attack on your marriage
One of the unusual things that happens to marriages
The enemy had taking your attraction from him
Seek spiritual council
Ann
September 1, 2023 at 4:46 pm
My sister am so sorry,it’s very pain ful I can only imagine what U go through every night I think U better start embracing the bitter truth before it’s too late,or or two things is happening,this guy has another woman out there whom he sees during the day,it’s bitter and sad to believe but pay close attention U will find out,another thing that could be happening to U is spiritual either ur under an attack of rejection as result Of witchcraft.rejection can make aman to look at you like a fellow man,U can only go into a spiritual warfare,begin by praying and enquire thru prayer what and the source of your problem then U pray knowing what you r dealing with, Jeremiah 33:3-4 enquire God will reveal to you great and hidden things, Ephesians 6:10_18 spiritual weapons.my dear try this and continue to stand still keep your position as a married woman be patient and endure the Lord will redeem your marriage my sister bless you
Hademe Precious
September 1, 2023 at 5:06 pm
He is having low confidence that is leading to erectile dysfunction. All you do is to help him to be on,hold the cap of his JT, if that fails,let him watch pornography with you and I will recommend bang bros. But please,don’t get addicted to it otherwise he won’t function without it again.Be mature with it.
Diamond Owolabi
September 1, 2023 at 5:55 pm
Try to make him jealous and see if he will come around if not get some test done to know if he has a medical emergency which he is trying to keep it away from you.l
Edwin
September 2, 2023 at 4:54 am
This is fictious
Ogechi Ogochukwu
November 11, 2023 at 8:26 am
What you struggle to get, you will keep struggling to maintain…run to God who has the maniscipt of your lives for repairs and He will establish you. Seek Him you will find Him
#marriageconconsultant#
Luanna
September 3, 2023 at 8:22 pm
Young lady some times,ur hubby might not be in a gudmood for dat,alot of things stuck men all the tym,he is not scared of lossing u right now so wake up and engage your self with something else please
Solomon
September 24, 2023 at 2:45 am
Just stress am sure these are dates before ur parties
Fru
November 21, 2023 at 9:13 pm
It so difficult to advice you on this my dear I think the only thing you have to do it that pray for him maybe his enemies are at work something he likes then he does not want it again