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A Man Wants to Marry me But He is Physically Challenged. What should I do?- Lady Seek Advice



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Good morning. Please hide my identity before you post this. I am a 24 year old girl and I recently graduated from the University where I studied political science. I am currently waiting for my NYSC and in the meantime, I help my mom sell clothes in her shop. I am getting a lot of suitors and making a choice has been quite challenging for me. Out of all the men that have been seeking my hand in marriage two of them stand out the most and I actually love one of them more than the other. However, my problem is that the one I love and have chosen to marry is physically challenged. He has problems with his left leg so he limps when he is walking. But he is a very good man. Speaking with him makes me feel at peace. He understands me perfectly and speaks to me in a very polite manner. He is just 5 years older than me yet he addresses me like we are mates.

The other person is also a young guy but we do not have good communication. We speak only once a day because he always claims to be busy. Also when we talk the conversation is always formal and we don’t even make jokes or anything. The conversation is always straight forward, we only talk about our day, and that’s all. He rarely take extra interest in things that concern me life my family, future goals and the rest of them. He doesn’t know much about my family and he is not even bothered. He doesn’t ask specific questions about them, all he does is just ask generally about my family and that’s all.

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Should I even talk about money? He doesn’t ask whether or not I have money. How I subscribe for data he doesn’t know but he calls me on video calls sometimes. He knows I am not working but he doesn’t even care to support me at all. Don’t get me wrong, I am not depending on him for my upkeep, no! At least he should ask how I am coping without a job, he can just ask. At least he should show concern about me and my well-being, it is not too much to ask. He has never asked me about my plans after school and how I hop to achieve them but the first guy makes my world brighter. He is always calling me and asking after my family. He knows every member of my family by their names, what they do and some of the things that interests them.

He also sends me money regularly. Even though he sends me money, he still goes ahead to send me data and sometimes sends someone to deliver some packages to me. He knows me so well and knows when I am not happy. He is always available to talk to me and make me feel better. He gives me every detail about himself and his events. He motivates me to set goals and work towards them. One of the amazing things he does is that he helps me achieve these goals. I have not gone for service but he is already searching for jobs for me. In fact, I think I can say I already have a job, all that is required is for me to finish my service. I really really love him and I won’t think twice about marrying him but my problem now is my mom.

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She is a very vibrant woman and she cares a lot about her reputation. She is a classy woman so she always loves to brag. Knowing my mother too well, she will not allow me to marry the man I love because of his leg. She will definitely talk about what people will say and how she can’t stand a limping man. I don’t know what to do about this. I need help. I love this man and I don’t want him to slip through my fingers. What can I do?

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