Relationships
My wife is Secretly Building a House Without My Consent And I feel Terrible- Man Cry Out
Please keep my identity hidden. I am a married man. I was working in a production company when I married my wife. We met at a wedding reception and talked. We later got married a year later and this is our sixth year of marriage. I used to be rich, I had money to care for my family and also give to people but I had a major challenge in my place of work and it led to my resignation. My wife on the other hand owns a big fashion house which I helped her to open when I was doing well. When we got married she was not working and she tried getting a teaching job but all to no avail. My friend suggested that she go to learn a skill instead of sitting idle at home. I told her about it and she agreed. She had prior knowledge of sewing so she had to go for an upgrade. To cut the long story short, she finished learning it and I opened a shop for her.
She was good at what she was doing so she was getting customers and also started getting people to learn from her. After some years she expanded her shop so generally she is doing well now. We have three kids presently and when I lost my job, things were not so difficult for us because I had some savings and she was still running her business. I tried getting another job but you know how things are in Nigeria. It was difficult for me and the few places I saw were not paying well. She was supportive initially and convinced me to take one of the jobs while we looked out for other jobs and I did. I was still bearing most of the responsibilities in the house even when she was obviously earning more than me but I never complained. Things got so bad that I couldn’t Manage anymore so I had to tell her about it.
She said she was saving her money for an important project, I asked her what it was that she could not share with me but she said she would tell me when the time is right. I wasn’t having any of it so I kept asking her, she later said she was saving to buy equipment for her business. I didn’t understand how she would be saving up for that while we starved. My salary was nothing and we could no longer depend on it. She feeds well when she goes to work but she rarely cooks so when I get back from work and bring the kids home, we rarely have what to eat and whenever I confront her she ignores me and walks away. She may only cook for that period but in less than two weeks, she will go back to her usual way. This has caused a lot of trouble for us in the past and it still does but the major problem right now is that she is building a house and not saving to buy any equipment
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I found out two days ago that the woman I share the same roof with bought a piece of land and is currently building for her shop. I don’t know if I am supposed to be happy about this or furious. I mean, it’s a good thing that she is expanding her business but why would she do that at the expense of our kids and I? We barely have enough food to eat and instead of her providing for us she channels all the profit she makes into building a shop. That aside, why would a woman I called my wife and provided for since we got married be handling a project as large as a house not tell me about it? It is obvious she has no regard for me. I know she makes a lot of money from her business but I never knew it was so much for her to buy land and even build a house. I feel betrayed and I don’t know what to do. The worst thing is that she doesn’t even feel remorseful. All she said was that I should be grateful that she is progressing. I am going crazy. How do I handle this?
Anthonia Agawereh
September 30, 2023 at 9:48 am
Don’t really know what to say about this your situation except that some women can be mean. Money will smile at you again and when it does thru working for people, create another avenue to make money as a second job . Have investment that you can fall back on. Don’t show anger to your wife because it’s really not necessary but be more sensible next time money comes.